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Yes. I'm still alive. - The wise One, the ancient One

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June 30th, 2006

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01:55 am - Yes. I'm still alive.
Okay, so.  I haven't updated in WAY too long.  The main reason for that is that I simply have quite the issue with sticking to something that I don't particularly enjoy, i.e. Livejournal updates.

Yet, I really would love to have a good record of my life as it progresses for me to look back upon and see how I've changed over the years, and to relive different experiences that I went through (am going through) in life.  So here is my yet another attempt at daily updates.  Let's see how long it goes this time, eh?!

Currently I am seeing a very special man.  He is young, yes, a green 20.  He's both very immature and mature.  But who isn't at this point in their life?  I guess I've always thought of myself as mature beyond my years, and for the most part, I am.  But there are a few key areas in which I am probably one of the most immature people I know.  Anyway, I digress.  Josh is wonderful and beautiful, smart and kind.  He cannot tell a lie, of which I am in utmost admiration.  He drives a really fast car, in which I scold him for driving too fast!!  It's never felt so natural to be in a relationship with someone before, and it's something that I am enjoying.  I hope to be with him for as long as we can.

A lot of things have changed for me since my last dark and deep entry.  Reiki has really been a saving grace more times than one.  I'm still going to Reiki clinic regularly, which is really helping my ability to help people heal themselves, and to teach others how to use Reiki for themselves and those around them.  There have been a lot of remarkable happenings at Reiki clinic that have really opened a doorway for me into the possibilities Reiki holds for me.  Bea has offered to do an exchange session with me sometime, and I really need to contact her and set up a time so that I can get some much needed Reiki!  I've also taken on my first student, something I should have done a long time ago, instead of waiting to be able to teach a "class" of more than one student, cause finding the space and time for that was improbable at this time in my life.  She is doing a little better than I had thought!  I knew that she would be VERY perceptive to energy, and very good at channeling.  But I didn't eexpcet that it would happen so smoothly on her first try!  Her healing energy is so calm and soothing, it is really nice and refreshing.  She'll be ready for her attunement in no time, and then she can begin practicing Reiki!  And that will be very exciting indeed.  
On a related note to Reiki, I contacted Jessalyn about receiving my final attunement in Oshune Reiki.  She promptly gave me times that she has available, and I then sent her an e-mail telling her the time that works for me...but also letting her know about my financial situation at this time, and that I won't be able to pay the full amount on July 12th.  So we'll see what her response is to that.  I really hope that she'll still give me the attunement regardless, so that I can be completed in Oshune!

Bath & Body Works has become a headache.  We are not making plan and therefore lots of labor hours are being lost, and my shift has been cut the last 3 days in a row!  This is VERY VERY bad, because without the income I have NO way of paying for Rent (which I'm still ahead on), electricity, internet, and my medical bills that are still left over.  Plus I have my short term loan to pay back in August,  AH!!!  I have NO idea what I'm going to do!  I guess I could send my aunt an e-mail, she said that she wants me to e-mail her if I ever get into a financial pinch, and that's what I'm in right now!  So, if worse comes to worse, I'll probably be sending her a little message.  But I need to find another job, that's more reliable and steady, so I'm putting in an application at Coborn's.  Grocery stores are very reliable jobs, and I REALLY hope that they will hire me, because I don't think they are really "hiring," but you never know, perhaps I'll get lucky!  I really love working in a grocery store, and I've done it for two years, so perhaps they will take that into consideration and maybe that will help me get the job!  Let's all keep our fingers crossed!

Personal stuff?  Well, I'm having a little trouble with irritation, frustration and anger right now.  But I'm at least expressing them more than I used to, so I think that's a big step for me.  So I think now the next thing to work with is to release as much of that as I can.  Now, I don't want to rid myself of the feelings, because I can certainly use them to my advantage, I just need to be able to be free of them when I'm around certain people, namely my boyfriend.  Also my health is still a little shakey, but I think we are getting that back into order.

I feel like this is where I will stop for this evening.  I always get so long winded on these things, and Josh is probably not appreciating the length of these entries right now as he reads through them per my request.  I will make all the efforts in my power to update tomorrow night and the next and the next. etc.  I really need and want to make this a daily routine!

Thank you all for reading!


P.S.  Thank you Josh for being so wonderful, even when you're not.
Current Location: My townhome in St. Cloud
Current Mood: calmcalm
Current Music: none

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